美国原汁原味访谈录:最有效的约会和求婚方式
日期:2008-09-14 11:19

(单词翻译:单击)

RELATIONSHIPS : Spring Flying To Diamond Ring

No matter what stage you are in a relationship, whether you are just starting to like somebody or getting more serious, there're a few things you absolutely need to know.

~~~~~~ Dating ~~~~~~

The first step in a whole relationship process, of course, is dating .You have to make sure you like this person and you have to make sure that you're presenting yourself in the best light possible.

--- dating tip 1: are you relationship ready? ---

People think that they're ready all the time but that may not actually be the case. Of cause you may have just got out of a relationship, you could be rebounding, and of course if you don't see what has gone wrong in your last relationship and the ones before it, doom to repeat the same mistakes over and over again.

--- dating tip 2 : read the signs ---

Read the signs. Now that goes for somebody who you just met at a bar or at a grocery store. It also goes for, your platonic friend, maybe a co-worker you've had your eye on. Of course you wanna see if that person has their body-language open to you, if they're flirting or kind of looking you from across the room.

--- dating tip 3 : trust your friends' tastes ---

It's also important to ask your friends for help and let them do the work that they so desperately want to do, so let them set you up. Dating does not have to be difficult, with that said, there're some pitfalls you absolutely should avoid.

--- dating pitfall 1 : don't reveal everything ---

One mistake people can make when they're first meeting somebody is disclosing too, too much about their past relationships, about their family, about all sorts of things that you wanna learn over time.

--- dating pitfall 2 : be yourself ---

You wanna make sure that the pickup line that you're using doesn't sound rehearsed, it doesn't sound cliche, and it really represents who you are. Sometimes you can just say: "Hi, how are you?" I mean it really can be that easy sometimes.

--- dating pitfall 3 : don't be too sure of yourself ---

Of course, girls love that guy at the end of the bar who is absorbed with his friend and looks kind of cool and distant , but they also want to make sure that you're approachable, otherwise nobody's gonna come up to you. Say, you've been dating and you're thinking it might be time to get a little bit more serious with other person.

~~~~~~ Getting Serious ~~~~~~

--- getting serious tip 1: get on the same page ---

Have the talk, don't just assume that you're both gonna be exclusive, that's a mistake that women especially make.

--- getting serious tip 2 : spend time together ---

You wanna have a great time, but you also wanna make sure that you're getting to know this person. Eva Longoria and Tony Parker spend a lot of time together, and especially when they're first dating they make sure that they spend their weekends together and they spend at least 3 nights a week together.

--- getting serious tip 3 : let them know how special they are ---

There's nothing wrong with a grand gesture every now and then. There's this great story that has to do with Mary J Blige and her now husband Kendu Isaacs. Now she had asked him to go to Los Angeles with her, and he said, you know, I can't, I need to do work, I need to stay home. She got to her hotel room and there were rose petals everywhere, there was a bath with candles and he was in the closet waiting to surprise her. So, don't jump the gun, because you never know if your significant other is planning.

--- getting serious pitfall 1 : don't smoother ---

While you are all excited to get exclusive with this person, don't go there too soon, because don't forget you're still getting to know this person. It's natural to want to spend all of your time with this new person, of course, you're in love, and you're so excited to be with this other person, but you don't wanna monopolize the other person's time. Nothing kills a relationship quicker than possessiveness and jealousy. Trust me on this one.

--- getting serious pitfall 2 : don't get too comfortable ---

You wanna make sure that you don't fall into a rut and take your significant other for granted. Now Will Smith, I have to say, might be the perfect husband because he is always ultra romantic with Jada Pinkett Smith. She said that one time she went to band practice, and she had all of these rose petals surrounding her microphone, and she says that he does stuff like that all the time.

If things have been going really well, and you're ready to actually take the plunge, there're a few things you need to know.

~~~~~~ Proposing ~~~~~~

Proposals can be all about location, location, location, location, you've heard it before, we are gonna say it again.

--- proposing tip 1 : get creative ---

I mean look at some of the Hollywood couples out there. Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, on top of the Eiffel Tower, one of the most romantic places in the world. Of course you have to know what the other person likes. Will they like a private engagement ceremony or will they like something that's in front of everybody like Star Jones. She was proposed to at an All-Star NBA game, make sure you know your significant other.

--- proposing tip 2 : being old fashioned is still in style ---

Know when to embrace tradition and when to send it out the window. One really sweet story has to do with Alanis Morissette and her fiance Ryan Reynolds. He actually flew out to Canada to talk to her parents and asked for her hand in marriage. Very traditional, very, very sweet.

--- proposing tip 3 : ladies give a helping hand ---

OK, guys, all the pressure is not necessarily on you. This is a great way to shake up tradition. Ladies, you can pop the question too, just look at somebody like Pink or even Britney Spears. Britney was on a plane with Kevin Federline, and she actually turned to him and said "do you wanna get married?"

--- proposing pitfall 1 : don't ignore hints ---

When you're getting engaged, one of the big things that you wanna make sure you do is show that you know the other person. If you choose the wrong ring or engagement scenario that the other person might not like, that shows that you might not know that person.

--- proposing pitfall 2 : don't give into peer pressure ---

Marriage is a really big important step and you wanna make sure you're doing it for the right reasons. The right reasons don't include doing it because all of your friends are doing it, or because you're so swept away in a moment. Look at Renee Zellweger and Kenny Chesney, they had a very short courtship; they jumped into it and they got divorced just a few months later. You wanna make sure that you're not one of those statistics.

--- proposing pitfall 3 : marriage won't solve all your problems ---

One big mistake that people sometimes make is thinking that a marriage will fix the problems in a relationship. Not necessarily the case. A marriage also won't change somebody and change their past history, and how they're gonna deal with future problems. It's never been confirmed that what exactly happened with Charlie Sheen and Denise Richards but there have reports that Charlie may have gone back to his old ways. The celebrities may have done things in extravagant over the top ways. And that's because they're celebrities and they have a lot of money. But you don't have to do the exact same things as them. Use them as inspiration. Remember it's about the two of you and doing something that is special to the two of you. Do that and you really can't go wrong.

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重点单词
  • ignorevt. 不顾,不理,忽视
  • planeadj. 平的,与飞机有关的 n. 飞机,水平,水准,刨
  • revealvt. 显示,透露 n. (外墙与门或窗之间的)窗侧,门
  • absolutelyadv. 绝对地,完全地;独立地
  • gesturen. 手势,姿态 v. 作手势表达
  • exclusiveadj. 独占的,唯一的,排外的 n. 独家新闻,独权
  • jealousyn. 妒忌
  • confirmedadj. 习惯的,积习的,确认过的,证实的 动词conf
  • traditionaladj. 传统的
  • platonicadj. 柏拉图哲学的,柏拉图主义的,理想的,不切实际的